Cob Jockey

College Graduation

The site of my Dressage education.

The most important trait of a good show outfit is that it makes you feel confident, relaxed and in charge of the ring. You shouldn’t have to worry about too-long sleeves, a baggy jacket, non-breathable material in the hot sun, or itchy breeches. You’re there to ride and look damn good doing it, and the outfit needs to help that cause, not hinder it.

Now for my reasons.
1. As of three months ago, I was a lifelong hunt seat rider. My plaid coat, pinstriped show shirts, and olive green Ariat Pro Circuit breeches are going to identify my former life so quickly, the judge won’t even have to watch my ride to know what to write down: “Rider seems tense and forward,” “Relax through the ankles,” and “Rider: there are no fences anywhere in this arena.” I can see it now.

2. All of my breeches and tights currently have at least one hole in them. Including my “show breeches”. Every. Single. Pair. (Except this one pair that I bought when I was 20lbs heavier. When I wear them people laugh and ask if “saggin’ baggin’” is the new look for 2011.) It’s probably because I haven’t purchased a new pair since high school, but who’s counting?

3. Full seat breeches: What am I missing out on? Would they make me stop sliding around so much in the saddle? Is this the holy grail of riding attire that I am missing out on? I wouldn’t know, because they’ve never graced my rear before.

4. Street cred: I have destroyed what little I may have had at my new Dressage barn. First I show up in half chaps and jeans, then I get on the horse with my hip angle so closed that all the teenage Dressage Queens at the barn wondered if I had a stomach ache. I’m hoping that maybe with discipline-appropriate show clothes I would gain a few shreds of my pride back.

5. My horse is embarrassed. Yes, the 23 year old gentleman that I ride each week has threatened to end our relationship if I show up in the show ring wearing “that.” He knows Dressage way better than I do (Thank God he remembers that we have to halt and salute at X, because sometimes I don't) and he’s afraid of what his buddies will say about his choice in people when we go to our first show in April.

I rest my case.